Tuesday, 30 June 2015

Serious-ness

Narrow-minded people bored me to the core.
Don't talk to me if you had that disease inside you.

Serious talk.
Serious shit.

Monday, 29 June 2015

Truth





Now open your eyes see the truth what lies infront of you

Reality.

Sucks
Wrecked
Damaged 

Is not enough to speak up your mind 
To tell the universe how broken you are 
how you hate every inch reality caressed yourself

To the point you hate everything . EVERYTHING

You may numb the pain 
but still you can't lie to yourself
the feelings inside still drives you insane


Thursday, 18 June 2015

Revolves

Dunia berputar--
sama juga macam life kita semua.

Kau buat orang , satu hari nanti orang buat kau .

Jangan satu hari nanti tu datang , kau lelong cerita kat semua, padahal--

kau lupa.
Kau dulu pernah buat orang.
Tak fikir apa dia rasa waktu tu?

Thursday, 11 June 2015

That one person we wish for

Aku suka skrol ig 
Aku suka skrol tumblr 
Baca feed yang boleh hadamkan rasa yang kau tengah suffered
kira macam ahhh ada orang rasa apa kita rasa

Selalu jugak aku tag kengkawan ye lah saja nak kongsi 
saja nak bagitau tengah ada dalam situasi macam tu--

but then lately ni--
aku rasa macam itu satu bebanan 
apa yang aku selalu luah 
susah nak express sini

bila aku terbaca kawan aku kata:
“aku ni dah macam konsultan (etc apa aku tak ingat) kengkawan ada masalah semua datang kat aku” 

haha laaaaaaaaaaaa , sorry in case cam nyusahkan nak luah sendiri takde guts lmao

The fact , aku selalu rasa nak ada someone yang boleh aku nak rants anything 
yang aku tahu selalu ada 
nak kata kawan boleh memang lah kan kawan ada ngan aku cuma kadang kadang diorang pun ada masalah sendiri hmm

dulu ,ye waktu aku ngan Ad aku selalu cerita ada benda nak rants , dia dengar patiently then respon and bila dia pun rants , aku dengar respon bila klaka memang gelak cam gila bila part cam touching memasing assure memasing ahahhahahahaha cerita lama lah kan

aku faham bila ada certain orang kata dia nak ada someone , not really into a relationship tapi hmm someone yang boleh tahan lah kan special  cuma tak act langsung cam lovers tapi more to bestfriend , deep down im really adore that kind of thing

pujuk jelah hati ni , takyah layan sangat kalau ada , ada lah Allah datangkan mungkin Allah nak aku jaga hubungan ngan Dia , baru Dia datangkan kat aku someone tu, who knows kan

Allah is the best planner , after all . 
Indeed.

Tuesday, 9 June 2015

survivor final projek

Hari ni aku rasa pertama kali dalam sem dua
sesusah mana sebelum ni--
paling nak bunuh diri sebelum ni--
hati rasa paling payah--

aku mintak tuhan kuatkan aku
jadi survivor pada esok hari demi final projek
sebab aku rasa aku terlampau rasa jahanam--
malah lebih jauh dari sebelum ni

tuhan,
kau paling agung

Saturday, 6 June 2015

Past and future

Opened up to those good and old memories sometimes hurts me to the core , yeah im serious af okay .

Taktahu cemana boleh terbukak topik pasal relationship aku yang lama tu . Ye , the only relay dalam hidup aku buat masa ni lah . Lol hahaha , we can never predict how our future would turn out .

Yes , aku admit those good and old memories was damn hard to forget just like that . Aku taktahu aku bebetul move on ke belum . Ntahlahnak . Why bringing up 3 years ago punya benda ? Lol to myself lah

Sebab aku susah nak ada perasaan betul-betul kat orang . Sebab aku rasa aku terlampau jadi jenis yang reserved and a keeper person , indeed . I search fr the best so that i could have that the best fr the rest in my life , kan? 

I don't intend to search fr the perfect one . nope . I don't search fr the perfect looks ( i know well how does i look ) , talking abt rich damn it money can't buy happiness bear that in mind because bluarghh men nowadays said women being materialistic and so on lol but what i look in the first place is a perfect soul that could match with mine . 

Growing up , and i do realized how important to have that kind of partner, I once read some good pieces of words from tumblr , how amazing that one day we have someone in our life that we can talk abt anything , random and deep conversation , that one person that can be our listener to anything we rants--
that was how i changed my mind yeah to marry someone ( bfore this i always refused lol ) yes i even told my parents idk fr countless times maybe , i really hate the fact that we need to get married someday , i felt like im putting my life at risks if im marrying someone lol how immature i was back then maybe too many watched those drama melayu yang kadang kadang ntah pape lah kan 

That shows how biggest my fear was back then sampai taknak kawin bagai ahahahahahha actually sampai sekarang tapi tengah pelan pelan nak berubah kekeke . I once had someone that yes i can call special , once weh . Itulah pertama kali aku try break my ice inside me , learn to accept someone . Everything was cool at the beginning till yeah the most thing yang aku paling takut jadi , semua benda tu hilang . The pain ? Hurts as hell . Sampai sekarang trauma tapi aku tau semua tu ada hikmah kan? Kalau ikutkan malas nak ingat balik gagaga tapi i can't lie to myself , aku still tak lupa semua tu . 

I even have a thought agak agak dia ingat lagi ke aku ? Bongok juga fikir macamtu padahal he got someone else now hahah , lets just pray fr his happiness kan ? For now , focus jelah design hahaha . One fine day , ada jugak nanti ahahahhahahahahahahahahah k.

So that is it , enough fr now i write too long and rant too much lol .